Revelations

Even though I was expecting some critical comments to my input on NFOA, I was bit surprised by some of the impressions I created in some readers. I think everyone who has commented so far has, at least, welcomed my input and participation even if they didn't agree with my perspective. The most surprising thing was that some felt I was being, shall we say uppity, in my comments regarding poor spelling, grammar, or use of logic in others' writings. I certainly didn't intend any personal attacks, or even that people in general are less important or deserving of expressing their opinions simply because they weren't Enlish or logic majors. My point was simply that in order to most effectively further their cause (in this case, securing our second amendment rights), good grammar and logic would be of value. For anyone who was offended by my comments in this regard, I offer my apology (more than Obama has done for his perceived verbal slap in the face to the police in Cambridge).

I also admitted that, as hard as I try, I too have an occasional typo, misspelling, improper grammar, or misuse of a word. I hope that helps to clear up any misconceptions I may have created. I do realize that I am a bit egotistical, competitive, often obsessed with perfection (both in my own efforts and those of others), and a little stubborn. There are probably lots of other adjectives for my personal traits that are less than flattering. I often consider myself a moderate extremist with an obsessive compulsive (and yes addictive) personality. Some of those terms may not seem to go together, so let me explain.

I usually find myself, after a great deal of thought and self-examination, taking a path that is somewhat middle-of-the-road, in terms of political or ethical issues. Though I can understand the perspectives of those on the extremes, I don't often find that I agree totally with either of them. (Therefore the moderate label.) On the other hand, in my personal life, I find myself going to extremes quite often. I don't eat breakfast or lunch because once I start eating, it seems I never want to stop until I'm stuffed. I can go all day, or even longer without food and not give it a second thought, but once the food hits the palate, I'm not stopping until I'm really full or I get too tired to keep my jaws moving. That's just one example. When I start a job, I don't like to stop until it is completed. If I can't afford to buy every conceivable thing I might need in pursuit of a new interest (hobby) I'll often decide not to do it at all. And the list goes on. I'll go over my efforts at writing, edit them, read them again, do some more editing, delete half of it and start over, and continue this process until I'm absolutely certain that I've made my point as well as I can and that there are no mistakes in it. (Unfortuneatly, it often doesn't work.) That's the curse of being a perfectionist: you're never happy with anything you've done, and if you know you can't do it well enough to meet your own standards, you often just don't do it. I like to think I have a great deal of will power. I did stop smoking "cold turkey" some 30 years ago having smoked for nearly 15 years and going through two and a half packs a day toward the end of that time. Still, there are a number of things I would really like to stop, but I can't seem to work up the conviction to do it. I drink several beers a day, and I can't settle for the cheap stuff, I have the have the micro-brews that cost usually well over a dollar a bottle. I absolutely hate the idea of spending so much money on beer (which only makes me want to take a nap and adds to my difficulties in keeping my weight in check). Still, I love the taste, and it has become a habit that I'm sure won't go away unless I can find something with which to replace it. I'm not sure if I'm addicted or just excessive-compulsive about it. I've tried just having one or two a day, but it seldom works. I usually end up having four (or more). I can, and have, quit drinking beer all together for as much as two or three weeks at a time, several times, so I know I can do it. I guess I have to have something as my "crutch" or my "indulgence" and I haven't found anything better (or cheaper, or with fewer calories) yet. And, I've begun to recognize other obsessive-compulsive behaviors that continue even though there is no real benefit or logic to them (simple little things, like the way I floss my teeth, or weighing myself every morning without fail).

Yes, I've got some weirdness just like everybody else. My point in bringing all this up is to let people know that I'm aware of my imperfections, and that I don't consider myself "better" than others. I know we each have our own abilities and limitations and philosophies and codes of conduct. Most of us believe, or would like to, that our own concept of how the world should be is the right one. We act according to our beliefs. But, even though we may believe our way is the right way, a truly intelligent person realizes that everyone (even those who are "different" from them) has just as much right to their belief. This is probably the cause of most of the conflict in the world: human nature forces us to act on our own beliefs regardless of what others may think.